Question:

I'm a ballet dancer, but my mom frowned and said no when I asked for tampons. How can I convince my mom to help me use a tampon? I hate dancing in a pad.

EXPERT ANSWER

That’s a tough one. If you aren’t sure why your mom is against having you use tampons, I would encourage you to ask her. Finding out her reservations to your using a tampon will help you understand her perspective better. It’s possible your mom is worried that tampon use will cause you to lose your virginity (which is a myth) or perhaps she thinks girls can’t use a tampon until after they are sexually active (another myth). Of course she may have completely legit reasons for not wanting you to use a tampon, but without asking her you’ll never know. Let me know what she says and perhaps after you have talked about it more she will be more comfortable with the idea. You might also consider talking to an aunt or friend of your mom’s who you are comfortable with and see if you can get some more advice about how to approach this subject with her. Good luck!

MOM ANSWER

I know I have let my kids down many times when they were just trying to reach out to me and ask me an uncomfortable question. I will try to put myself in your mom’s shoes guess that she might have something against tampons?  So consider taking it past her frown and start a conversation. Ask her first if she has used one and what did she think? Listen to her response, and then tell her tell your side. Consider starting your sentence with “I feel.”  That hopefully will allow you to share your side and feelings, and how you would appreciate the chance to give it a try. I hope this helps and good luck!

PEER ANSWER

I'd imagine dancing in a pad to be kind of awkward and worrisome. Worrying about my pad leaking onto my pants was enough reason for me to bring up the subject of tampons with my mom. Given that my mom, at the age of 50, left the applicator in the first time she used a tampon, you can imagine how hesitant she was. I wanted my mom to feel comfortable with the thought of me using tampons because, one, she was the one who was going to be buying them for me, and two, I needed her support in case I had any questions or issues. It took a long conversation with her before we decided that we'd both try them. That way she could understand entirely why I wanted to switch, and what it was like to do so. My mom ended up switching back to pads but felt more at ease with me using tampons. Now, my mom asks me questions about tampons, for example, how long she should keep them in for and how to hide the string when she's wearing a swimsuit. I can't say that your mother will do the same and decide to use tampons with you. But I can say that you'll need your mom's support in deciding to use them. Have a conversation with her, tell her why you want to switch and show her that you're responsible and mature enough and ready to make a decision like this. You have good reason to want to use tampons, let your mom know that.

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