How can I survive my period without my parents finding out?


A period shouldn’t be something you hide from your parents. Your period should be something your parents know about – even if you feel awkward or embarrassed telling them. It’s one thing if you don’t feel obliged to tell your dad, but in my opinion, your mother should know if not for the reason that she’s your mother, then at least because she’ll be able to provide guidance and “motherly” advice. Also, because she’ll probably be the one buying your pads and tampons. You should be neither ashamed nor embarrassed by your period – especially in the company of your parents. It’s something completely natural, and something your mom’s been going/gone through for a long time. By telling her, and talking to her about periods, you’ll find that it’s not only comforting to share something like this in common, but also, surprisingly fun (it gives mothers and daughters a sort of “girl thang”).


For this question, I am focusing on the mom side because, in my experience, dads are not always as keen to chat it up about period stuff. I think you should tell your mom. Eventually your parents will find out you started -- otherwise it might worry them if they thought you never had your period and you are graduating high school! I wanted to exaggerate the circumstances so you might see it from their perspective. I would worry if my girls did not start because it is a normal, anticipated step for all girls. Try looking at your mom, and imagine her dreading the conversation when she had to tell your grandma about her period! She has been “in your shoes” too. Consider taking her aside for a quiet chat and ask her to please just listen. Share with her your need for privacy and how this is personal for you but you wanted her to know. From a practical side, if you need products, moms come in handy for purchasing liners, tampons and anti-cramp pain relievers. I hope this helps you, my girls love to tell me what they need and I certainly am thankful they do.

Your question makes me wonder if you feel that you period is something shameful or bad -- like a secret that must be kept hidden from your parents. In reality, your period is a positive sign of your growth and development as a woman! Though you may not want to make the details public or discuss them with your parents, it is likely that you have little reason to fear them “finding out” that you have started menstruating. I recommend that you find a time when you can sit down and talk with your mom or dad (or both!) and let them know your concerns. You may need some help initially -- for instance, you may need someone to buy “period supplies” such as pads or tampons for you. Your mom may also be able to tell you about her experiences with her periods, and what she found helpful for managing symptoms such as cramps or bloating. Though it may be tempting to keep your period a secret from your mom and dad, chances are good that in the long run it will be easier, and perhaps even helpful, for you to tell them about this important step in your growth and development.
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